>You can't help but laugh, reaching up to indiscriminantly pet your pones to pacification
>After emergency bellyrubs, earscritches, patting, petting, and of course the not-really-publically-acceptable [spoiler]hoofholding and telling them they're good ponies[/spoiler]
>your group goes off to stand in line 
>Silly horses
>You sigh contentedly
>Yeah, today's finally going to be a normal day!
>I mean, you're at a fair specifically designed as a pissing contest, but, hey! You're not being kidnapped!
>Man, you are so hyp-
>"Anonymous - a..-ANON! Dangit, tell me your full name so I can yell at you properly!"
>Aaaaahhh fuck
>You just had to fall for that trope
>Turning, you're met with the one horse everyone in this town knows
>No, not the pink one
>tomato-themed deelyboppers swaying menacingly in the breeze, [spoiler]Caramel[/spoiler] stares you down
>"Anon! You didn't tell me you were coming!"
>Oooo he's scrunching up so hard!
>"E-ever since you started herding you've stopped hanging out with the rest of the guys!" He trots forward with the indignant stare of a friend
>"Now are you gonna come sit with us or am I going to have to be disappointed?"
>You chuckle, reaching down to pet [spoiler]Caramel[/spoiler] gently - around his headband, of course
"You know, that's not necessarily a punishment."
>He looks up at you, sticking out his tongue. "Yeah, but you have to live with not being awesome!"
>His deelyboppers sway in sage agreement
"Well..."
>He looks at you with all the sadness his little horse face can muster
>Your torso visibly flinches as your heart struggles to keep pumping
>NNNGNGGGHHH-
"I-I couldn't live with myself otherwise. Lead on!"
>"Yaaaay!" He sits down to clap his hooves together before hopping back up, grabbing part of your hand in his mouth
>"Thiff vah!"
>Aaaaand this is something you didn't expect
>You're led into the main tent, weaving around some of the already-set up tables to-
"Oh! Oh hey!"


>You wave with your free hand - seriously, who mouths the hand nowadays? - and the table of stallions responds
>"Sup Mac, Thunderlane. Mr. Cake?"
>The yellow stallion turns towards you, joining his friends in a wave. "Well, hey there stranger!"
"Isn't hay for y'all?"
>"Uh?"
>....FUCK YOU THAT WAS A GREAT JOKE
>You sigh as early onset DADs ravages your body
>With an unceremonious *ptoo* your hand is freed by your always overenthusiastic friend
>"Hey everypony! Anon actually got out of the house-"
"Hey!"
>"-and he's comin' to sit with us!"
>"Let me guess," Thunderlane begins, "-your herd's competing. Right?"
>You nod
"Yeah... apparently this is a big deal?"
>You shrug, and everyone else rolls their eyes
>"Yeah, yeah. It doesn't get interesting until we get to the tomatoes, though."
>Taking a seat, Caramel joins you - you find yourself now sandwitched between him and Big Mac
"And... what, is it just how many you can eat?"
>The horses laugh
>Well ok then
>"What, really?! No! It's just - they dilute the juice, but it's usually added to either water or chili, depending on what's prepared..."
>Ok. This sounds... really fucking lame
"Sooo...so?"
>"So?" Big Mac looks up at you, and you shrug
>He furrows his brow
>Ok, you're missing something here, but whatever
>"Oh oh oh! Carrot, look!" Caramel points, and you all turn
>Not 50 feet away from your table is the foal's area - and suddenly it makes sense as to why you're sitting HERE, with the other guys
>There's a lone mare in the playpen, toddler horses latched onto all her limbs, slowly dragging her down to the ground
>She reaches out for help, palpable fear in her expression and eyes
>As one the horses daww
>"They're growing up so fast" Carrot muses, turning back towards Thunderlane. "Isn't your little brother in ther-"
>"Aah, no, he's in the yearling's area-"
>"Oh, right! He's getting so bi-"
>UGH NO PLS NO CHILDREN TALKS


>"Soooo Anon! Tell me... what's it like dating Big Mac's sister? Any stories you can share - maybe foalhood stories about Mac?"
>Caramel you cheeky bugger
>A red hoof swipes infront of you at your friend, and you laugh
"Well, to echo my red friend here - Nnnnope."
>"Daww, come on!" Caramel pouts, his boppers pressing against your shoulder. "You have to give me something! When we play poker, he has no tells!"
"Hmmm. If we split your earnings, I could be persuaded-"
>You feel a somewhat forceful nudge at your side, and Mac's head suddenly fills your periphery
>"N-noooo~" he whines softly
>You laugh
"Alright, alright, damn... so, do we get fed too, or-"
>"Oh! Well, sorry, I already ordered for the table, I didn't know you were coming-" Mr. Cake begins, but you wave him off.
"No worries. So, what's everyone been up to...?"
>And so the day is spent
>A few jokes here
>Some lame music on stage
>Every so often Mr. Cake or Thunderlane will run off to check on their charges/family, and the table will lull into a comfortable silence
>Dang. Is this going to be a normal day after all?
>FUCKING BRAIN WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THIS SHIT
>"Colts, here's your food!"
>Some background pony, not even worth the time to describe, drops a few very large plates onto the table
>Let's see
>Boiled hay, oats, apples - thankyouverymuch - salad...
>You start adding to your plate, helping load up Caramels as well
>"H-hey, uh, I'm... uh."
"Hmm?"
>You turn to Caramel, and he's blushing slightly
>"I'm... a little short-"
"For me, yeah-"
>He scrunches up, and you smile
>"I'm serious! C-can... can I uh, sit on your lap? I wanna be able to see!"
>You think for a moment before shrugging
>It's not like these horses have any sense of personal space, considering Mac's already snuggled up to your side
"Yeah, sure, ju-NO!"
>You stop him just as he was going to place a hoof right in the middle of your lap
>He looks down before chuckling bashfully, moving around the nono spot


>Circling around like a cat, he finally sits down
>He... has a pear-shaped flank
>And it's kinda heavy
>....and warm
>BRAIN WE ARE NOT IN THE GYM, THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO BE GAY
>You switch plates with him, allowing the little guy to keep chowing down
>Apparently his new height has also made him the alpha horse? Cause now everypony listens to him
>You just FEEL the smug radiating from him
>And from the deelyboppers that keep batting your cheeks
>Ah well
>Suddenly the lights dim
>"MARES, GENTLECOLTS AND FOALS OF ALL AGES!"
>Woah!
>A spotlight focuses on a grey-maned mare as she apparently kicks off the festivities
>"We will be beginning our Rust Belly competition shortly! First, let's thank our handsome card-colt, who will be keeping score for us!"
>A brown stallion with an even darker brown mane trots onto the stage to a mixture of cheers... and boos
>"Town Cart!"
>"You dye your coat!"
>"Boooo-"
"GENITAL WARTS!"
>Wait are those coming from your table?
>Whoops
>His face sours, but he recovers, the little bastard
>You feel a hoof kick you lightly, but you grin
>These little horses gotta step up their smack-talk game, yo
>Anyway. The mayor makes a big show of setting up the...setting
>Fuk u
>And soon about 50 mares trot onto the stage
>Aah. So, they don't really face the crowd until a majority of them drop out
>"First up - One pound pound cakes, courtesy of Pound Cake and Sugarcube Corner!"
>Mr. Cake of course cheers as loud as he can, and you all join him
>Yeah you play favorites
>What
>The cakes are trotted out, and that slut walks around the stage with a big "1" card in his hooves
>Does a little shake for the audience
>....yeah, he's a slut
>And the round begins!


* * *
[spoiler]>A black-gloved claw scratches against a lock in desperation
>With a growl - a burst of low flame - and it's not an issue anymore
>Lifting a lid to the crate marked "DANGER - DO NOT TOUCH", our assailant smiles a small, toothy smile
>Nopony will miss.... just one. Maybe two, to be certain...
>Now to plant the, hmm, plant, and be done with it![/spoiler]
* * *
"Aww, come on! TECHNICALITY, TEEECHHNIII-"
>You raise your hands as Bonbon is kept in play
>She hurled!
>Doesn't matter that it didn't make it out of her mouth - she still lost it!
>Thunderlane laughs at your outburst. "Well, somepony's getting into it!"
"I'm honestly surprised! This is oddly entertaining!"
>Big Mac chuckles lowly. "Eeyup. S' sometimes nice to see a little comeuppance."
>Well! There's a streak of shaudenfreude you didn't notice before
>...to be honest, though, he's just been staring at his sister
>His sweating, deep-breathing sister
>Yeah. She lasted longer than Flutters and Rarity, but... maybe Twi will bow out before her?
>You didn't know that girl could EAT.
>Rainbow Dash is basically looking like an overstuffed pidgeon
>And Pinkie is... Pinkie.
>The card reads "10"
>"AND NOW, FILLIES AND COLTS, WE MOVE TO THE TRUE HEART OF THE RUST-BELLY COMPETITION! ONLY THE STOUTEST AND STRONGEST OF MARES HAVE MADE IT THIS FA-"
>You sigh
"Get on with it already! You're not running for office!"
>Thunderlane snickers
>"OUR FIRST; WATER AT 100 TIMES DILUTION!"
>A perfectly staged audience "ooooo" ripples through the crowd as a mare in a hazmat suit comes out, making a big show of holding a pitcher of... water in tongs
"Ok... just, what?"
>"Oh!" Caramel shifts in your lap - come ON bro - and you feel the top of his muzzle poke the underside of your chin
>NO sense of personal space, you think, as you idly rub his chest and tummy
>"It's just a show - 100x is nothing - but sometimes it makes mares freak out-"
>As if on cue a couple girls bow out, to the jeers of the crowd
>"Eeyup!"
"Huh."


>The water gets served, and you idly reach over to your plate
>Aah, a few more apples - great
>Though, they feel a bit soft?
>Whatever
>You pick one up and bring it to your mouth, taking a refreshing bite
[spoiler]>Far, far behind you, hidden among the boxes, a black-gloved claw clenches in anticipation[/spoiler]
>Oh! Oh, well, this makes sense - after all, it is a tomato-themed festival
>Wish you had some salt, though.


>Nguu ehr ERRNG EEEUH
>And FUCK you are full
>That pound cake... it expanded. Nopony told you it would expand
>"Now, our paramedicponies are on site to make sure to care for any mare who starts to have a seizure-"
>Ugh... whatnow - oh right
>You blink the spots from your eyes as you look at the glasses being set before you and the rest of your competitors
>Yeah, some of your herdmates made it, but. Now? Now it's all about who will be alpha
>You, Twi, RD or AJ
>Pinkie doesn't count because she's NOT EQUINE
>No groaning, no moaning, nothing. Just happy excitement for what comes next
>Twice other mares have demanded to have her place checked - but nothing. No pile of food on the floor, no portal... nothing
>She turns and smiles at you with a genuine, honest smile of a lover
>You give her your fullest fat-pone pouty face
>Damn... hoers... politics
>THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE ALPHA
>BETA IS JUST FIRST LOSER
>You feel something soft and heavy lean on you, and you try to shrug it off
>"Gnzuh? I'm... I'm here-" RD whines, shaking off the food coma
>COME ON
>PEGASAI PRIDE WORLDWIDE
>Your hooves bat at the table in defiance
>Other mares.... seem to join you
>What are you doing
>*bam* *bam* *bam*
>"Woooah! It seems we've got a challenge going on! Very well then; 100x, no magic, final destination!"
>The glass is filled up
>You're not concerned.... some of the tribes you've uh. Exposed to the western world?
>Liberated?
>.....borrowed from without consent or intent to return?
>Yeah. Borrowed from - used to stab small, pebble-like tomatoes with their arrows before firing them at you
>So you built up a mild resistance to the stuff
>Still
>You swallow
>It's more the volume than anything
>If you can just buy some time, maybe you can digest a little more and-
>"H...how are the colts d-doin-"
>You give the mare who said that a lazy glare
"Thas...fn' fain idea-"
>Whomever you are
>Luna bless you
"O-Oi Ref! How...."
>Mayor Mare tilts her head and trots over. "What is it, Daring? And don't get sick on me - I've got hooves to shake and interns to abuse after this."
"Hhhhow are the boys doin'?"
>The mayor cuts her eyes at you
>You cut your eyes back at her
>She stagewhispers to you "are you asking me to buy you time?! That's not how this works, Dari-"
"Aahr...you askin' meh... t' donate eh-*gasp*-er again?"
>Fuck you mayor you owe me after my "donations" to your campaign
>Sensing that she's going to possibly make one of her newer and larger donors look bad in public, she quickly puts on a stage smile
>"A-aha....ah yes! Let's see how our lovely boys are doing - aren't they great for cheering these mares on?!"
>Good save
>Grey-maned bit-
>The stagepony swings a spotlight over to the colt-area
>Really it's the foal area, but, you know how colts are
>Griffon-eyed when it comes to the chilluns
>And they all smile and wave
>You take it all in with a grin
>There's your herdcousin Big Mac
>That one pegasus you've seen a couple times
>Aah, Mr. Cake. 
>Fuck you, Mr. Cake
>Limp-dicked stud....
>YEAH you're still salty over that pound pound cake! That's not NICE
>You just came out here to have a good time and you're just
>feeling so full right now
>There's some SLUT ON YOUR MAN'S LA-
>Oh wait not that's secondbest stallion, everyone's friend
>Caramel
>....your wings rise of their own accord
>Anon, the predator, cornering poor Caramel, doing....
>Whatever it is gay horses do
>Touch butts?
>Lewd
>And there's Anon, your hubby
>For some reason you see a blur of purple launch itself from your side
>Followed by pink
>Huh... he's just waving
>There's a commotion in the crowd, apparently, and you hear a few baritone screams
>What?
>He's just waving
>With a moist...smile?
>There's nothing wrong about that
>Hell, he's eating an appl-
>. . .
>that's not an apple.
>THAT'S NOT AN APPLE AT ALL.
>With the fury of a hundred fat pidgeons, you launch yourself ontop of the table, RD rolling off behind you onto the ground
"ANON! NO! ANON PUT THAT DOWN RIGHT NOW!"


>You are Anon
>And as soon as the spotlight hit you, you smiled and struck a pose
>I mean... that's what the deal is here, right?
>A few mares looked at Caramel with a mixture of jealousy and lust
>He wiggles
>....the smug radiating from him could keep you warm for days
>So THIS was his game
>To be the horse-king
>Ah well, whatever
>Like a good pawn, you raise up your tomato, waving to the crowd
>Yeaus, yeaus, the king-horse on the tomato chair sees you all
>yeau-....
>you shudder
>Every single pony's eyes just shrunk to pinpricks in unison
>WHELP. 
>NO NEED TO SLEEP AGAIN. 
>EVER.
>And suddenly there's a whole lotta yelling
>Apparently AJ flips one of the tables
>Ponks and Twi are flying towards you
>No, you don't know how it works in ponks case
>Just
>There's a lot of quick, sudden movement rocketing towards your head very quickly
>Hey brain?
>Yeah, Anon
>Go poke Lizardbrain, see what knee-jerk reaction we should go with
>Aight
>Oi, Lizardbrai-
>FLIGHTFLIGHTFLIGHTFLIGHTFLIGHT-
>You straight up fliplaunch Caramel out of your lap, his spinning torso aimed directly at Twilight
>The look on her face is priceless as they collide, fwumping to the ground
>Spinning, you vault over the bench you were sitting on and make a mad break for the foals area
>USE THE CHILDREN TO COVER YOUR ESCAPE
>SURE THING, LIZARDBRAIN
>You dive into the foal's area, the cries of both mares and stallions filling your ears
>But there is no time
>There is only ammunition
>Kicking open the gate from the inside, you start picking up foals and skipping them along the ground
>It's like bowling, but with much more terror and adrenaline
>You start taking parents out at the knees, some of them diving to get hit in the tummy with 20lbs of foal
>Yeah. TAKE THAT EYE-RAPE HORSES
>Running out of earthorses, you quickly pick up a stray unicorn
>Leaning back, you're at the 50
>the 40
>the 30
>You toss the unicorn child like a football at Pinkau, who screams something about the cakes and makes a dive
>SHE DID IT
>IT'S GOOD
"SPORTSBALL! SPOOOOORRRRTTTTSSSS-"
>You lift the top of the baby gitmo, freeing the pegasai children
"FLY, MY PRETTIES, FLYYYYYY-"
>Giggling, they take flight, making a beeline for the hanging lights
>Mares and stallions lift off to grab them
>But your minions are undeterred
>....YES. IN THE COVER OF DARKNESS, YOU WILL MAKE YOUR ESCAPE
>YOUR TRAINING IS COMPLETE, LITTLE BIRD HORSES
>GONNALIVEGONNALIVEGONNALIVE
>YES LIZARDBRAIN!
>You launch over the baby barricade once more, the muffled "thank you, good sir! thank youu~" of the sacrificial foalsitter not registerring in your brain
>*pamf*
>Nnngh~
>You wobble as something fat and heavy-

>You are Daring
>HEY! That's not nice!

>Back to Anon
>FAT AND HEAVY AND SOFT slams into your side
>It's chirping and neighing at you 
>LIZARD CANNOT HANDLE WORDS
>You begin swinging your arms around
>NO MASS RAPE
>NO HORSE EYES
>NO MORE RIDE
>Something else blue and fat and heavy poofs into your back
>Fuck you're getting COMFY
>Lizardbrain, help!
>NO. DANGER GONE. FIGHT, FUCK OR SLEEP?
>Fuck, you're not helpin-
>FUCK IT IS
>waitno
>Another horse takes you out at the knees, and you fall on your side
>Poppin' your questionable boner
>Why is this your life?

>YOU ARE DARING
>CAPS IS THE ONLY WAY TO THINK
>OH FUUUUUCK
>THIS IS WHY YOU DON'T LET HUSBANDOS OUT OF YOUR SIGHT
"OH FUCK OH FUCK"
>Ok, calm down
>He's on the ground, AJ's lifting his legs -
"AJ, he didn't pass out-"
>"CONSARNIT WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO DO-"
>She yells at you with wet eyes-
>You blink and look away
>everypony's panicking
>You've got to keep your cool
>Breathe in... Breathe out...
>RD's cradling Anon's head, weeping and peppering him with kisses
>That's not going to help! Stay calm! Keep him calm!
>Uh.. uh, ok. ok. Ingesting poison, induce vomiting
"AJ! Flip him over!"
>"B-"
"DON'T BACKTALK. DO IT."
>AJ, with credit to her entire race, flips your husbando over onto his stomach by his feet
>That's...that'd be impressive, if you had the time or mental capacity to appreciate it
>It's also landed Anon's face right into RD's tuft
>She latches onto him with all four hooves
>Know what? No time to warn her
>AJ looks at you
"The horslich maneuver!"
>With gusto AJ hops up, mounting your stallion
>She starts to squeeze
>Unfortunately, she's only really... hanging onto his flank
>Damnit
>"Ah! Ahnon!" *grunt* "Hold on! Ah'll save you!"
"Do you not know how to- JUST MOVE!"
>You dive onto Anon's mid-back, turning around to grip his abdomen
"HEAVE!"
>You squeeze
"HEAVE YOU BASTARD!"
>You squeeze again

>You are Anon
>Now, your world is blue
>It smells of fresh rain, a little tang of salt, and it's vibrating
>Those seem like sobs
>....wait, is that RD? Why is she cry-
>Suddenly there's a weight on your ass
>It starts to squeeze you
>OH FUCK YOU KNEW IT
>IT WAS ALL A RUUUUSSSSEEE
>Another weight lands on your back and starts rubbing your tummy
>YOU ARE NOT AN ALLIGATOR
>THIS WILL NOT RELAX YOU
>LIZARDBRAIN SAYS FUCKFIGHTFUCKFIGHT
>With inarticulate yelling, you rise from the pavement, blind and being humped, erection tenting your pants
>So, yanno. Average Thursday night.
"DAMN YOU, OLMEC! I DIDN'T TAKE YOUR TREASUUURREEEE-"


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hDVVplAweZw
>You are not a pone you have been before
>You're also not the aplien, who's sitting on the ground being tended to by his mares
>You are PONICE CHIEF CUDDLE WINGS
>And if the stories you're being told right now are true
>This brave stallion before you, when he discovered untended tomatoes in the general population
>Immediately evacuated the stallions from the area
>And even rescued every foal in the tent single-hoofedly!
>What a hero
>And he's even refusing to be sent to the hospital - dang thick-headed colts
>The paraponies can't get near him without getting booped
>Such fire! Such drive! Such a desire for JUSTICE!
>You wipe away a marely tear with your super-soft wings
>Time to mare up and mare this mare with mare and mare
>maremaremare
>You stop chewing your notepad and step up to the plate!
>....mare
>stopthat
"Excuse me, Anonymous?"
>The human looks at you with a mixture of concern and annoyance, his hand retracting from a scrunchy-faced nursecolt
>"Hey, look - I dindu nuffin."
>Oh dear he thinks he's ponies - eer, in trouble!
"Oh! No no, you're not in trouble, sir! I'm just, I'm the ponice chief. I'm here to personally make sure whomever did this hayne... hay..."
>You scrunch
>You always get like this near a qt stallion!
>"Heinou-"
"Haynous crime! Poisoning a colt - and possibly multiple ones at that - that's, well. That's grounds for immediate banishment at best!"
>His herd nods at you and he sighs, shrugging his shoulders
>His broad... thick should-
>"I mean, ask away. I keep trying to point out that my species eats a lot that yours can't-"
>"That's just silly talk, anon! No species eats nightshade!" The princess chides, shaking her head
>Turning to you, one of the unicorns - Rarity, you'll learn later - pipes up. "Well, you know how colts are. 'I can't have this, it'll go to my barrel, I can't have that-'"
>Suddenly she's [spoiler]petted[/spoiler], and her snootie scrunches up
>LEWD. IN PUBLIC!
>You shake your head
>He'll... get away with this, but only because of his traumas
"Sure, sure. I know how studs can be."
>"Hey! Is... wait, is that an insult or-"
"But we gotta figure out what happened. Now, we got the skinny from your mares, but you gotta tell it to me straight."
>The colt huffs, his cute little chest rising and fall-
>FOCUS
>"-ying, I sat down with the other guys, we caught up-"
>Oh buck you're going to be here for a while
>"-with his ass right on my junk, and I'm like 'hey brain, no tim-' "
>You start doodling
>"-so I move our plates. Then-"
>Hey waitaminute
"So wait, uh. You moved plates?"
>He nods. "Yeah, cause Caramel was in my lap. So he couldn't reach, but I could - so I moved my plate away from me..."
"...and that's how your got the tomatoes slipped into your food."
>He shrugs. "I mean, it makes sense. The lights went out, I wasn't paying attention-"
>Typical
>"and so I had a couple of 'em. I mean, that's the festival, right?"
>Haha wut
"Wait... you..had multiple tomatoes?!"
>His mares stare at him with a look.... the look you give your foal when you realize that they'll wear a helmet all the time, not just for riding scooters
>He boops another nurse who got too close
>You sigh internally
"Alright...just...and you're SURE you don't need the paraponipatapons?"
>He shakes his head. "Hell no. All I need is a little bit of salt-"
>Another gasp
"Sir, drowning your sorrows in a shaker is not the healthiest way to-"
>"Please, cophoers. Is there anything else I can do for you?"
>You scrunch slightly
>Fine. Trauma'd male, just.... get to work, gumshoe
"No sir. We'll take it from here - just make yourself available for some follow up questions in a few days and we'll be good."
>Maybe he'll remember something? Maybe his mares can get him to open up?
>Who knows
>BUT PONICE CHIEF CUDDLEWINGS IS ON THE CASE!


>You are still PONICE CHIEF CUDDLEWINGS
>And it's into the wee hours of the night
>Luna... at least gave you a full moon, but
>You've interviewed nearly 100 ponies
>Had magic forensics on the case
>Tested the tomatoes - they came from the locked batch
>Tested the broken lock - or what was *left* of it....
>You sigh
>This is going to be one of those hard cases
>It could make or break your career!
>High profile attempted assassination of a half-dozen colts! Including the princess' own?!
>You bow your head, scouring the ground for more clues
>trying to WILL something into existance
>....nothing but your own hoofprints
>You sigh
>the silence is broken by a lone twig snapping
>You turn towards the noise
[spoiler]
"Oh?! Hey, who's - oh! Sorry, this is a closed crime scene-"
>Your guest interrupts you
"...look, I don't know what you're talking about, and that's slander-"
>Your guest provides evidence, which you snatch from their gloved claws
"...h-how... how did you get this. How did you get this?!"
>A demand is made
"N-no. No! Do you have any idea what that would do to me- if they found out I was-"
>You lower your voice, looking around
"-l-look, I left that life... behind, ok? I've snugglestruggled my last colt. I'm clean."
>The demand is repeated
"....you're sick. But I'm damned if I do, and damned if I don't, right?"
>Your guest's toothy smile flashes in the moonlight
"... you did this, too, didn't you? And now because of this I can't CLOSE THIS CASE!"
>You slam your hooves against the ground in rage, and your guest laughs as he leaves in the shadows
>DAMN IT
>DAMN THAT LITTLE BASTARD
[/spoiler]