>Be the local jolly green giant
>Be heading to work 
>Because of these strange ponies sexist beliefs you had managed to find a job as a kindergarten teacher
>Something about your “foal chasing legs” made you a good fit
>You don’t really understand, but you didn’t even have to have an interview 
>They just asked you to start Monday
>You aren’t gonna complain though
>You had spent the last couple of months job hunting 
>And for once the sexism was on your side
>As you make your way down Canterlots side streets towards your destination you can’t help but be nervous
>Sure you had babysat kids before on earth, but this would be a lot more work
>You were just thankful that there would be another teacher there to help train you
>Also you were happy to have something to do 
>You were going a little stir crazy in your tiny apartment
>Heh
>Your neighbours probably think you’re some crazy person with your antics
>It may have been overkill to completely fill the hallway with toilet paper, but it was absolutely worth it to see the looks on their faces
>Chuckling at the memory of the stallion having an adorable little fit, you check the address that you wrote down
>Should be right around here
>Yup
>There it is
>You can see the sign over the old building
>Canterlot Foalhood Education Centre
>What a mouthful
>At least you’re not late
>That would be a terrible first impression

~

>Be Gold Star
>Be tired
>So very tired
>You really shouldn’t have stayed up that late on a school night
>In your defence it was a very engaging book
>You sip your coffee as you use your magic to sort through the schedule for today
>Circled in red ink was a notice that you may or may not have totally forgotten about
>A new hire starts today
>Better not be like the last one
>You grumble at the memory of the young stallion that had worked here last
>He was lazy, rude, and didn’t give a hoot about the foals he was supposed to be watching
>He had quit after two weeks, citing a “hostile work environment”
>You weren’t sad to see him go
>You just hope that the new pony wasn’t as bad as he was
>As you continued to sip your coffee to try and wake up, the bell hung in front of the door rang out
“At least they’re on time.” You mumbled under your breath as you trotted out from your office to greet the newbie
>And stopped dead in your tracks
>There, standing in the doorway, was one of the biggest creatures you had ever seen
>It’s head nearly touched the ceiling!
>It turned to face you, it’s adorable foal-like eyes fixing on you
>“Oh, are you Ms. Star?” The creature asks you in a surprisingly sweet baritone voice
“Uh, oh, yes! Can I help you?” You ask the creature warily
>“Perfect! I’m Anon, and I’m pleased to be working with you.” It- no, he- responds cheerfully
>Wait
>What?
>WHAT!?
>This thing was gonna be your assistant?
>You gulp down the lump that had suddenly formed in your throat
>On the plus side, you don’t need that coffee anymore
~
>You tried to shake off the shock of the big stallions entrance
>It’d be rude not to, after all
>Come on
>Say something!
“So Anon, how’re you?”
>Really?
>Is that the best you could come up with?
>Something you’d never seen before walks into your daycare, tells you it’s your new hire, and you just ask it how it is?
>Your Papa didn’t raise you to be rude!
>As you mentally kick yourself for your behaviour, the ape creature smiles warmly down at you
>“I’m good, thank you. And how’re you?” He replies
“Uh, I’m fine thanks”
>You clear your throat, more so to collect your thoughts then to draw Anons attention
“I assume you’ve been told of all the duties expected of us teachers, right?”
>The stallions grin turns sheepish
>“No, I was told you would train me.”
>You groan under your breath
>Of course Red just dumps the new hire on you without any training
>Why wouldn’t she?
>You turn around and gesture for Anon to follow you
“Ok then, I’ll walk you through our facility here.” You say as you start walking towards your office
“This here is our playroom” you say pointing to a room filled with toys, small chairs, and other supplies
>To it- his credit he does seem to be paying attention 
“And here’s my, I guess now our, office.” You continue, pushing open the door to a small room with a desk and a few filing cabinets “This is where you’ll be doing paperwork with me after all the foals have gone home. There’s only one desk and chair, I’ll see when I can get you one.”
>Turning to look at the stallion you see him ducking his head down to actually get through the doorway
>It’s almost surreal in a way
“Alright, now onto the training.” You speak up to him once he finally makes it into the office “Here at the CFEC we strive to deliver the very best in foalcare in Canterlot...” You launch into the corporate speech you’ve completely memorized at this point
>You honestly don’t even remember half the words
>You just say the speech that you’ve said a hundred times
>Once that’s over you look up at Anon
>Who still seems to be paying attention
“Now, just follow my lead for the first few days and you’ll be fine. In about 15 minutes we have to go to the local school to pick up the foals and take them back here. Do you have your Company ID with you?”
>Please say yes
>You have enough to deal with without trying to convince scared fathers that Anon is an employee on top of being a strange, giant creature
>“Yeah I have it right here.” He replies 
>He reaches into a weird pouch in his clothes and pulls out a lanyard with his ID card on it
“Perfect. Do you know your hours?”
>“Yeah, every weekday at 2:30 TIL 6, right.”
>You sigh in relief
“Good, good. At least they told you that much
>You turn to check the clock on the wall
>Classes would be letting out soon
“Alright then Anon, welcome to the crew. A little joke, heh.”
>He just looks at you
“Cause, you know, I’m the only on here.”
>He frowns
>“Really? They put you here all by yourself?” He asks “don’t you have anyone else to help you?”
>You smile at the big guy
“There was another pony, but he quit recently” you tell him “besides, I can handle it.”
>Yeah you tell em Star
>It’s big mare time
“We need to get going now anyway. Follow me and I’ll tell you about the foals you’ll be watching.”
>You head out the playroom, grabbing your ID from a hoop on the wall with your magic
>Putting it around your neck you trot over to the door with Anon following behind you
>Another day
>Another bit
>“Hey” comes a voice from behind you
>You look back to see Anon with a big smile on his face
>“Thanks for not freaking out when you saw me. I’m kinda new around here and I don’t know many people-er, ponies.” He says earnestly
>You smile back at him, feeling a twinge in your stomach at his soft words
“Don’t worry about it. We’re colleagues now after all!”
>You turn around again
“Now we gotta get moving or we’re gonna be late for sure.”
>“Lead the way!” Comes the reply from behind
>You start making your way to the school
>Anon quickly catches up to you with his long, long legs
>Unf
>Woah nelly
>You really need to get some action soon 
>Turning your head to look at the large stallion walking besides you, you begin to tell him all about the foals under your care
>Well
>His care now, too
>You don’t quite know why, but that thought makes you smile

~

>You make your way down the streets of Canterlot, passing ponies who stopped and stared at your large coworker
>He didn’t seem to mind the attention, though
In fact, it almost seemed like he didn’t even notice the stares
>For the whole walk he kept his attention squarely on you as you told him all about the foals he’d be watching
“So Field Goal is the oldest. She loves sports and running around. All in all, she's not really a troublemaker, just hyperactive.”
>Anon nods
“And Ink Splotch is the second oldest. She’s a very quiet kid, loves art. I try to give her some attention when I can cause she tends to be shoved to the background by everypony else if I’m not careful.”
“Lolly Pop’s a good filly. Sweet as her namesake, gets along with everypony. Best friends with Ginger Snap. Now she can be trouble. Doesn’t mean to be, mind, just lacks common sense.”
>You turn onto a main street 
>Anon dutifully follows behind you as you continue your list
“Gentle Breeze is the youngest by far. She loves playing with the building blocks we have. She hasn’t learned to fly yet so you don’t have to worry about that, thank Celestia.”
>You take a deep breath and sigh
“Special Snowflake is… a hoofful at times. He’s not a very enthusiastic member of our little troop, but he’s not old enough to look after himself while his parents are at work. He at least gets along well with Shining Jewel. Jewel is a good colt, just gets pressured by Snowflake into following his lead. He has a little sister named Tinker Top. They’re siblings so they don't get along that well, you know?”
>“Yeah I know,” Anon replies “I have a little brother back home. Aww man, we used to get up to all sorts of shenanigans when we were younger.”
“That sounds nice. Where’s he now?”
>Anon looks down
>His eyes get a faraway look to them
>“Back on Earth. But I don’t know how to get back there.”
>Oh No
“Oh I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to bring up anything painful like that!” You quickly apologize to the big guy beside you
>He glances over at you and gives you a small smile, his foal-like eyes gleaming in the late afternoon sun
>Hnng
>You can feel a blush starting to form on your face as you turn away as he starts to reply
>“Don’t worry about it miss, you didn’t know.”
“Please, call me Gold. Mrs. Star is my mother!”
>”Sure. I’m not one for formality anyway.”
>You both fall silent after that, with the only sound being the gentle clip-clopping of your hooves on the cobbled road as you made your way to the school
>But on the inside you were freaking out
>You had made a colt feel bad on his first day with your nosiness!
>This is probably why your still single
>That and the fact that your packing on a bit of a paunch
>It’s not your fault you don’t get out as often as you’d like!
>And that sweets are so good!
>You snap out of it as you realize you’re almost there
>Turning one last corner you see the school building
>You lead Anon into the yard, trying to ignore the stares of the parents here to pick their foals up
“Alright, here we are. Now, the foals know to meet us outside by this tree here,” you say, patting the tree for effect “so all we have to do is wait for them to get out of class and then walk them back to the centre.”
~
>Be a human in Equestria
>Three guesses what your name is
>You had met your coworker 
>Gold Star seemed nice, if a little nervous
>You stood side by side in silence looking at the squat brick building in front of you
>Schools must look the same in every universe
>Your gaze drops down to your new colleague
>The Unicorn mare is a light shade of pink with a golden blonde mane tied up in a tight pony(heh)tail 
>Her butt tat was a golden star surrounded by sparkles
>You remember the explanation you’d gotten when you’d first popped into existence in this world about how they signified a ponies special talent or destiny or something like that
>You don’t get it
>You realize that you’ve been staring at Gold’s ass for the last minute and quickly avert your eyes
>Not that it wasn’t a nice ass
>Stop thinking that thought right now, brain
>She’s gonna think you’re a creep
>And that is not a first impression you’d like to make
>A ringing bell brings you back to reality 
>Heh
>Saved by the bell
>Literally
>The school doors burst open and the sound of stampeding children reaches you
>A second later a literal horde of tiny horses comes rushing out
>You see foals run to their parents and get nuzzled affectionately 
>Others run to the playground, climbing on the slides and swings
>You see two of the foals rush towards you and Gold
>“Hi Ms. Gold!” The two say in unison as they skidded to a stop in front of you
>One filly has deep purple, straight hair and a lavender coat covered in dust
>The other has shorter peach and orange hair and a light orange coat
>Neither of them even came up to your knees
>“Uhh, ms. Gold, what’s that?” The orange one asks as she cranes her widdle neck up to see you
>The purple one just stared slack jawed at you, like if she blinked you’d disappear
>“This is Anon!” Gold Star says cheerfully “and he’s going to be a new teacher with us!”
>Now both fillies were staring at you
>You just hoped it was in amazement

~