>>21012955
>Pinkie Pie becomes jugsaw
>every trap she creates always involves you having sex with the pony to save them
>she just really likes to watch you have sex but won't admit it
>you call her out on it
>she nervously defends the legitimacy of her traps


>Be Anon
>Stuck in the apple family cellar
>Again.
>You sigh, giving a show of testing the "ropes" that bind you
>You hear a crackle and hiss, and a TV monitor springs to life infront of you
>"Hello Nonny. I'd like to play a g-"
"Ponka, who's the other mare?"
>The pink-maned doll stutters a bit, looking around. "P-Pinkie Pie? Who is this Pinkie Pie?"
>You just stare at the TV
>gettingtoooldforthisshit.png
>Looks like she's got her groove back 
>"T-the only way to get out of my dungeon of doom-"
>What a fucking horrible name, really? She's just phoning it in now
>"-is to figure out my puzzle. And Honestly, puzzles are fun with FRIENDS!"
>Ok dramatic reveal
>Rarity trots in with a weird contraption on her head
>Looks like a pasta strainer with eggbeaters pointed in her ears
>Scribbled in red on the top is "BRAIN BEATER 5000"
>pokerface.png
>"D-darling, you have to help us. The key to the door is here, but I can't use my magic with this contraption on my head!"
>Rarity brings over a contraption: a bucket with a funnel ontop of it, with a key sitting on some styrofoam on the bottom.
>"Hehehehe~" Ponka giggles. "Can you figure ou-"
"Fuck the mare until her juices fill up the bucket. That's also why I'm tied to this post, sitting on a chair, pantsless."
>Pinkie falls silent 
"And hello to you again, Rarity. What is this, twice in one month?"
>"I-I don't know why this monster keeps picking me! We need to figure out who this dastardly mare is when we get out of this horrid place!"
"It's... it's Pinkie. I mean, look at her. Same mane, same voice."
>"Grr, Uhh, It ist naut me, Ponka! I ahm, uh... Fuzzy....Bunny." Pinkie tries to mask her voice, and... I think do two or three really offensive accents
"Pinkie, seriously. Stop that."
>Pinkie looks down, silent
>"D-dear, even if it is Pinkie, we still have to get out of here or else we'll starve!"

"Hush, marshmellow fabric."
>"Hey!"
"This is a working farm. Someone will be down here in a few hours, or a day or two at most. That's also assuming we don't cry for help, cause it looks like we're under either the barn or the Apple family home. In fact - HEY AJ!"
>You hear a muffled thud, then a "Yea, whut?!"
"NOTHIN. WE UP FOR DRINKING TOMORROW?"
>"Yea! Ya'll know where, right? Also, why're you n' mah root cellar?!" AJ continues through the floorboards.
"DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT."
>You look at Rarity with a grin, and she sheepishly returns it. Looking back up at the TV, you see - aww
>Pinkie, mask off, crying softly
"Hey there Ponna Po, what's wrong?"
>"*sniff* I just try so hard to kidnap my friends an then it just all goes sideways an I just wanted this to work so baaaaaaad~" she wails
>You sigh. This crazy fucking horse land must be getting to you - you're actually feeling guilty
"Pinkie, I tell you what. I'll help you out-"
>She immediately perks up
"-if you admit to me why you keep doing this. And why me!?"
>Pinkie falls silent for a bit
>Ok, press your advantage
>In the land of marshmellow knee-high pones, the one who doesn't even lift is king
>You strain against the "ropes" - apparently today it's rainbow colored yarn - and they snap
>Once again. marshmellow pones can't into materials engineering
>You stand up, your cock now at face-level with Rarity. She starts to slowly lean in, but you're not paying attention
>No, now it's time for operation: where are my fucking pants
>Looking around, you take stock as to what's on the walls- scythe, hammers, drill, hacksaw, boxers - wait there we go.
>You start to walk forward but end up booping Rarity with your junk
>You hear an excited "yes" from the TV
"Oh fuck I'm sorry Rara-waitaminute."
>You look at the TV - an overly excited Pinkie looks back
>You step back from Rarity
>Pinkie frowns
>You step forward and dickboop her again
>Pinkie claps
>This repeats a few more times before marshmellow drama objects

>"EITHER GIVE IT TO ME OR LEAVE, DARLING."
>Whoops
"Sorry rara. Lemme grab my boxers and get the-"
>"Nooooo~" whines the TV
"No, Pinkie. Not unless you tell me the truth. Don't you think your FRIENDS deserve that much?"
>Pinkie looks audibly uncomfortable
>"Dear, don't rush her. She's obviously not enjoy-"
"She locked us in a cellar. Two days ago, I was stuck in a 'sinking boat' with Rainbow Dash and I had to fuck her wings free. Last week, Applejack and I were stuck in a compactor and the valve only shut off if it was filled with semen - and let me REMIND you, Rarity, that the compactor ended out being two really heavy cardboard boxes that she was physically pushing against us while making mechanical noises with her mouth!"
>Rarity looks away. "Well, I can't deny that is a bit weird. But still, you shouldn't-"
"Have you seen what's on your head? Seriously."
>Rarity blushes. 
>You look at the two mares, just.... waitaminute
>Pinkie never forces you to fuck her
>She always does the same type of traps with her friend-
>A devilish grin spreads across your face
"Pinkie....you like watching me fuck mares, don't you?"
>Pinkie stops moving, staring at you like a deer in headlights
>youlikecrabbypattiesdon'tyousquidward.mov
>"N-no!"
"You're not fooling anyone - look, these traps aren't even deadly, an-"
>"Y-yes they are! You could catch a cold, or get a little hungry, or even get a cramp if you sat weird for too long!"
>Really
"Like I was saying, these traps aren't even deadly, and you always position the TV/Recorder where you get the best views... you don't even sign off, now that I think about i-"
>"I have to make sure my diabolical plan works! T-that's why I observe every detail of your body, writhing and pumping against the poor mare th..."
>You cut her off with a look
>She was actually drooling
"Yeah, no. Admit it - you're a voyeur!"
>"N-no! I'm not! I eat eggs and fish sometimes!"
"No, Pinkie, not a vegan, a-"

>"Of all the nerve! Pinkie, have you been getting off to - to this?!" Rarity demands
>Pinkie nods softly
>Rarity sighs. "Darling, please. There are much more productive ways to get your kicks, you know."
>Pinkie starts to cry again. "I jus' wanna be a criminal maaaaster-mii-hiinndd~" 
>Full on waterworks
>But hey. You got your boxers on again. Now for pants.
>Rarity tries to console Pinkie, being as serious as she can with eggbeaters sticking into her ears
>"Now dear, it's not such a bad thing to want to be a peeping tom, but... you can't keep interrupting our lives like this! You know that's irresponsible. I'm behind on my orders as-is, and I'm sure Anon here has other things to do than play these games."
"Actually, I was on my way over to Twilight's to fuck her silly."
>"Wh-what?" both mares respond to your nonchalant answer
"Well...yeah. I mean, Ponks, you kinda forced me on half the mares in Ponyville. Considering my stamina, they kinda... well, ask me over slash pay me slash take me out on dates all the time."
>You look at them, confused.
"Rarity, you didn't think our little tea parties were the only-"
>"DARLING, PLEASE." Rarity silences you with sheer volume. "A-a gentlecolt like yourself never kisses and tells!"
"Uh..huh. Anyway. Pinkie if you promise not to keep kidnapping me, I can always make sure you have a view. If my partner wants it. Deal?"
>Pinkie mulls it over
>Rarity starts to shake off her fantastic hat
>"Deal. But I keep the mask on."
"Kinky."