I wrote this while drunk

>>33941524
>Okay.
>You are Twilight, and the worst-case scenario is that you have a panic attack right here right now and throw up on your shoes.
>Best-case scenario?
>You make out with a cute boy.
>"C'mon!"
>You watch as Anon, the newest transfer student from... somewhere, walks down the hall.
>His suit is pressed, his hair is trimmed, and your eyes instinctively seek out dat bulge between his legs
>And sister?
>It's a-jigglin'.
>Sunset jabs you between the shoulder blades, making you yelp and jump forward.
>"Do it!"
>Oh, god.
>Okay.
>Whoo!
>Right.
>You lurch forward, feet drawn towards Anon via autopilot you didn't know you had.
>Your mind is racing with doubts and what-ifs and traitorous thoughts of jumping into a locker and waiting there until the school day was over.
>But your feet led your reluctant body towards the ever-nearing new student, faster than your mind can come up with something to say that will convince him to hook up with you and Sunset.
>So, naturally, you are left speechless by the time you get within groping distance and reach out to tap him on the shoulder.
>Like any good boy of decent upbringing, he jumps in surprise and shies away from the touch of a strange girl.
>"Oh!" Anon gasps, whipping around to face you, "C-Can I help you?"
>Okay, Twilight.
>It's now, or never.
>Sunset is counting on you.
>Your disappointed mother is counting on you.
>Shining is trying to hook you up with his nerdy friends, and you've caught your dad staring sadly at grandpa's ornate and jeweled wedding ring!
>Now's the time to make Sunset proud.
>Now is the time to make every ancestor in the history of evolution proud!
>YOU ARE THE MOST RECENT LINK IN AN UNBROKEN CHAIN OF BOY-FUCKING THAT STRETCHES BACK TO THE DAWN OF TIME, AND IT'S ABOUT TIME YOU BEGAN ACTING LIKE IT!"
"W-Would you like-" you blurt, tongue spasming, "t-to watch some.. watch some movies with me?"
>There's a painful silence.
>"Uh..."
"A-And Sunshimmer?"
>Fuck, wait
>That's not her name.
"Sunset?"
>"Well-"
"Shimmer?"
>WHY DID YOU INTERRUPT
"There'll be snacks."
>WHY DID YOU THINK THAT WOULD BE INCENTIV-
>"...sure."
>What.
"Cool!"
>YOU DO NOT FEEL 'COOL'.
"I live at-"
>You mutter your address and hope you didn't stammer too badly.
>The last thing you want is for him to think you live downtown and end up getting raped.
"-and Sunset and I are having a movie night after school."
>You smile at him, putting on charm you didn't know you had right up until the moment you were put on the spot.
>AKA right now.
"You can bring chips if you feel like it."
>Anon smiles back at you, looking at east.
>"Hey, sure!" he chirps, "That sounds like fun!  It's been forever since I relaxed and just spent an evening watching a movie.  In fact-"
>Anon digs into his pockets and rummages around until he finds a scrap of paper.
>...rather, he doesn't find one and ends up tearing a corner out of his notebook.
>"Here, this is my cellphone number.  Gimme a shout of the plans change, alright?"
>Oh, god.
>...is this first base?
>You reach out and, fingers trembling and incredibly aware of how sweaty your palms are, snatch the piece of paper from between Anon's fingertips.
>He smiles at you as you stuff it clumsily into your breast pocket, taking three whole tries to remove your fingers with the sweaty appendages dragging the dry paper out with them.
>You stand there for a long two seconds, wondering where to go from here.
>Do you walk away?
>Do you kiss him?
>ARE YOU MARRIED NOW?!
>This has GOTTA be second base.
>...he's staring at you expectantly.
>Like he wants something in return for his phone num-
>OH FUCK
"H-Here's mine!"
>He wants your phone number!
>YOU WERE WRONG, MOM
>'LIL TWILY ISN'T A DYKE
>YOU ARE
>YOUUUU ARREEE!
>A little fumbling, a little uncharacteristic page-ripping (which is normally a mortal sin in your book), and a bit of pen-finding (right in your pocket protector), and you've successfully given a boy your phone number under the pretense of having a movie together.
>You've already surpassed your expectations.
>With a final smile and a wink, Anon walks away.
>Effortlessly gliding away, like all boys seem to do.
>God.
>Why are boys just so... effortlessly perfect?
>You're so focused on staring at Anon's patoot that you don't realize Sunset is sneaking up behind you until she slaps a hand on your shoulder.
>You yelp so loudly in surprise that Anon actually turns around to see what's happening, looking alarmed.
>You wave at him; he waves back.
>Nailed it.
>"So," drawls Sunset, "Did you do it?"
whoppsie i'm retarded and didn't bin the entire thing
>...
>Did you do wha-
"-movie night?"
>Sunset nods.
>You grope your tit just long enough to dig out Anon's phone number, which miraculously wasn't smudged by your sweaty appendages.
"He's down to clown with coming to my place for a movie."
>Sunset gazes at you with something almost approaching pride.
>"Well, hecks and dang," she crows, "I almost didn't think you had it in you, Sparkle."
>She pulls you into a headlock and - do your dismay - begins to grind her knuckles into your scalp, giving you a noogie.
>"We'll make a gentleman-killer out of you, yet!"
"S-Stop!"
>You're fine not being a 'gentleman-killer'!
>You wanna be just Twilight!
>Because Twilight has a cute boy who is, for some reason beyond your understanding, planning on seeing a movie with you!
>Tonight!
>At... your house.
>With you.
>In the dark.
>And Sunset.
>Oh god.
>Oh, GOD.
>Okay, there's that panic attack you were worried about.
>It's a few minutes late, but you know it's dependable.
>Okay, you think you're going to throw up soon.
>You don't wear shoes IN your house, so it's cool if you barf on them.