<Look at you, you poor, poor little thing
<Locked up in a jail cell, all alone with no one around...
<Well except for that box and-
“HE’S NOT A BOX”
<Okay, okay, Jesus calm down man, okay let me get back at what I was saying
“Go on”
<Locked up in a jail cell, all alo- With your square-shaped friend and nothing to eat except chocolate ice cream and cookies
<Why are you complaining again?
“I wanted vanilla ice cream…”
>The narrator turns to the audience
<Would you like to know how Anon got into this situation?
<When shit got serious enough to have him put in prison?
<Why I am asking all these questions?
<What’s up with Anon’s box?
“IT’S NOT A-“
<All of this begins a few days ago…
>...
>The scene shifts from the prison to a tree in the jungle
>A little bug is eating a leaf on the tree
>Suddenly, a monkey appears and eats the bug
>…
<Wrong scene, sorry guys
>The scene changes into a mouse running from a cat
<OH, OH, This is my favorite show! ….but it’s not time for this
<I’m not going to lie, I’m changing scenes with a controller, so let me choose the right one this time...
<Okay let’s see… this one not, this one either, yadda… yadda…
>The scene finally focuses in what appears to be a city in a desert
<Oh here we are, now on with the previously scheduled program

 
 
Be Anonymous, Master Sorcerer of the dark magics
>Well not really, you are just a single human who is in a mystical place where magical creatures live
>Dragons, minotaurs, unicorns and more, it’s like if you just woke up in a fictional world filled with badass creatures
>...Or a cartoon show, because there were a few ponies
>It’s been a few weeks since you appeared in this world with no explanation
>You are in a place you call Gerudo Desert, but the ponies called it Saddle Arabia
>What are you doing here? Just adventuring, trying to figure out how to get back to your dimension
>In the meanwhile, you’re also being a tourist
>Every pony is always so kind to you, not giving a shit about you being an exotic new creature
>It’s that, or you looked like an evolution of a minotaur
>The best possible evolution, of course
>You move to a building with a pyramid like look
>Looks pretty good, too bad you don’t have a camera with you
>You see two horses trying to lift some goods
>Might as well help them, because why not? If everyone is kind, why not you?
>You approach and say your greetings
>”Quick you dumb head, or we’ll be late for the boss’s pla-“
“Hello there, you guys look like need some help”
>”O-oh hi stranger! N-No, we are OKAY! We will just do it by ourselves!”
>Suspicious...
>The pony starts breathing faster and faster
“Nah don’t be like that, I can carry triple what you guys are carrying”
>The other pony starts sweating heavily
>”No, no, no, no! We are fine! Just go away please”
“Nonsense, I’ll help you at least with one…”
>”Oh for Celestia’s sake…”
>You lift a box and… accidentally trip
>With that, the goods in the box hit the ground
>Well not much goods, just another box
>A box in a box, just as weird as it sounds
>You quickly pick up the larger box again
“Ugh, sorry for that guys, It was an accident, I’ll just put this ba…”
>You look at what appears to be a box with a clock on it and some wires, red, blue and yellow
>This looks exactly like a bomb!
>...If the clock wasn’t drawn with crayons and the wires weren’t made from paper
>The ponies start yelling things in a language you don’t understand
>The left pony picks up a radio and starts yelling
>”Our cover has been blown! I repeat our cover has been blown!
>His radio crackles to life
>”Do whatever you can to get the packages; I don’t care if you hurt someone!”
>The pony nods
>”Roger that”
>And with that, the two ponies grab two balloons and then inflate them
>Within seconds, they each have a balloon sword
“...What?”
>”Gives us back the package or suffer our wrath!”
>You smirk
“Okay, okay, I’ll play your game”
>You carefully put the ‘bomb’ inside the box in your arms
>”Now put it on the ground!”
“Let me think about it…”
“…”
“Nah, I’ll keep it, maybe the authorities would like to see it”
>You say, joking, maybe these two are clowns
>”Don’t you DARE”
>And with that you quickly turn the opposite direction, running with the box in your hands
“Now where are the-“
>”GUARDS, THIEF!”
“Okay, this… isn’t going to end well”
>Three guards appear of nowhere and yell at you
>”STOP RIGHT THERE!”
>Almost cornered by the 3 guards and the 2 suspicious ponies, you see a weak point in their defences
>A field with a well-manicured lawn and filled with beautiful flowers
>You quickly sprint through the open area
>”HE’S TREADING THE GRASS! AND THE FLOWERS!”
<Oh so that’s why they weren’t walking here
<Wait, why is there grass in a desert?
“Hell, if I know”
>No time for questions like that now, you need to find a way to escape!
>Think, think, think!
>…
>There!
>A cart! Your escape!
>And with that, you jump into the cart…
>Nothing happens
>Well, this cart doesn’t work without a horse pulling it…
>Wait, there is a way to get this thing going!
>With what you learned from The Flintstones, you pick up the cart and start running with it
>”HEY! THAT’S MY CART!”
“I’ll give it back later!”
>”He’s a double thief! Stop him!”
“I’M NOT A THIEF! THIS IS A MISUNDERSTANDING!”
>While you weren’t paying attention to the road, a hill suddenly appeared
>You turn back to the road just in time to retract your legs
“Oh shiIIIIIIIIIIIIITTTTT-“
>The cart speeds up faster and faster as it careens down the massive hill
>Without someone pulling the cart, there’s no way to steer as you plummet down the hill
>A pony pulling a cart full of lettuces spots you just in time to escape from his harness and dive out of the way...
>Leaving his cart behind, right in the middle of the road
>Brace for impact!
>With god like speed, the carts collide
>You are thrown from the cart amid a rain of edible leaves
>”MY LETTUCES! GUARDS, THIS CRIMINAL HAS RUINED MY LETTUCES!”
>You land hard, knocking the wind out of you
“Did someone write down the license plate of that car….? Ugh…”
>Your vision fades as you slowly feel unconsciousness swallow you
>Even as you clutch the box in your hands